ampage Tech Humor


Gordon Fry 5/7/100 5:31 pm 113 0
A guy walks into my repair shop carrying an old Ampeg VL502. I ask him what the problem was. He said if he could plug it in, he could show me. He plugs it in and turns it on. Smoke immediatly starts pouring out of the amp. I turned it off quickly but the amp is still smoking even more fiercly than before. Flames start coming out of the amp and I take immediate action to get the amp outside and extinguish the fire. The customer then says "See! That's what is does."

Gordon Fry 5/7/100 5:48 pm 25 0
I had a customer walk into my shop to get warranty service on a fender tweed reissue. The customer tells me that he played at a party the night before and the amp was working fine then. The morning after the party is when he noticed the amp not working. I took it in and upon my initial inspection, noticed a dried sort of liquid residue on the exterior of the amp. Upon opening the amp, found the liquid to have penetrated more deeply onto the tube board. This dried liquid was causing an arcing on the tube board which is why the amp was not working. When the arcing was happening, there was an oder which reminded me of when I was a young boy and had urinated on a fire to extinguish it. Yes, you ask, someone had urinated on the amp at the party. For that person's sake, I hope the amp was "OFF" at the time! Needless to say the customer did not get warranty service for the repair charges.

Jim Robertson 5/10/100 0:35 am 41 0
I Work for a small Guitar store as tech/sales/whatever. We get some priceless phone calls like this:
A lady calls and asks if we know anyone who can read or write music because she has some piano music but wants it transposed for her keyboard. I'm usually not speechless but regained my ability to speak after a couple seconds and told her I thought they were pretty much the same. "No, you don't understand. I only have a keyboard but all my sheet music is for the piano." I advised her to seek out a piano teacher.

Liam 6/5/100 4:38 pm 27 0
A couple of years ago my girlfriend and I want to get her piano tuned. Not sure where best to get hold of a piano tuning guy, we go down the local musical instrument store and say "We're trying to get hold of a piano tuner, can you help?" The guy behind the counter disappears out the back of the shop for 10 minutes. Eventually he returns and says "We haven't got any in stock at the moment, do you want me to find out if we can order one?"

Justin Belshe 6/8/100 0:22 am 55 0
Buddy of mine sent me a copy of this ad, thought you might get a kick out of the payment options...

I have a 1972 Marshall head (RED) it is in mint cond, I called marshall and gave them the serial number they said it is worth 1500.
I have a new calzone road case for it also...
looking to sell price is negotable.... and will trade for a CAE pre-amp or Bogner fish
even trade for the CAE...
if a Bogner fish... i will give some cash plus head..

Danny Rawlins 7/15/100 4:41 pm 7 0
I'm new to this board I have a few bits of humor

the first is when I was around at a mates place who fixes amps and tv's and me mate cut the niple off the neck of a fulty picture tube then about 30 seconds latter a customer turns up to get a stereo fixed and hears the hiss and looks at the back of the picture tube and asks "What type of gas is in it!!"

We all know there is a vacume in a picture tubes and valves

ppl think valves arnt used anymore then I point out that the tv's and monitors contain a valve. thay don't beleave me untill I point out the crt!

Danny Rawlins 7/15/100 4:49 pm 14 0
I saw a wireless weekly mag. and had seen a sentance that said "the rectifier valve was lit up in blue crona discharge the fix was simple, I replaced the valve." Then the customer says "some of the gas must of got out of the valve!"


ampage Tech Humor